A friend's recent post reminded me of a quote that I first heard at Education Week 2 years ago. It's one of my all-time favorites...something that I pull out every couple of months just to refocus myself and gain perspective. The speaker is Pat Holland who is married to Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles. It goes like this:
"Our Father in heaven needs us as we are, as we are growing to become. He has intentionally made us different from one another so that even with our imperfections we can fulfill his purposes. My greatest misery comes when I feel I have to fit what others are doing, or what I think others expect of me. I am most happy when I am comfortable being me and trying to do what my Father in heaven and I expect me to be.
For many years I tried to measure the oft-times quiet, reflective, thoughtful Pat Holland against the robust, bubbly, talkative, and energetic Jeff Holland and others with like qualities. I have learned through several fatiguing failures that you can’t have joy in being bubbly if you are not a bubbly person. It is a contradiction in terms. I have given up seeing myself as a flawed person because my energy level is lower than Jeff’s, and I don’t talk as much as he does, nor as fast. Giving this up has freed me to embrace and rejoice in my own manner and personality in the measure of my creation. Ironically, that has allowed me to admire and enjoy Jeff’s ebullience even more.
Somewhere, somehow the Lord “blipped the message onto my screen” that my personality was created to fit precisely the mission and talents he gave me. For example, the quieter, calmer talent of playing the piano reveals much about the real Pat Holland. I would never have learned to play the piano if I hadn’t enjoyed the long hours of solitude required for its development. This same principle applies to my love of writing, reading, meditation, and especially teaching and talking with my children. Miraculously, I have found that I have untold abundant sources of energy to be myself. But the moment I indulge in imitation of my neighbor, I feel fractured and fatigued and find myself forever swimming upstream. When we frustrate God’s plan for us, we deprive this world and God’s kingdom of our unique contributions, and a serious schism settles in our soul. God never gave us any task beyond our ability to accomplish it. We just have to be willing to do it our own way. We will always have enough resources for being who we are and what we can become."
-- Pat Holland from “Portraits of Eve: God’s Promises of Personal Identity” (LDS Women’s Treasury)
4 comments:
Great article. Thanks! I was thinking of this sort of thing last night as I am constantly reminding myself that it is so easy to see how we are "failing" when we compare ourselves to others. Most of the time, the only failure comes from not remembering how great we are as ourselves! Thanks again. This is great.
love this. I have been thinking about this a lot lately and trying so so hard to not worry of others expectations of myself. It's the hardest thing and I struggle with it more than others I feel. Thanks for posting this- now I can come back to your blog every few months and read it. Maybe I should have come to education week with you? I would love to come next year.
You are the best Erin. I miss having you guys around here.
Hi Meerker family its R,R and Z I am so glad that you found our blog since for some reason i have not been able to sign up for the family web site. Now we can keep in touch
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